Tuesday, May 31, 2011

New Music: Dalal - Taste The Night

I found this catchy new song on Youtube from a hot young artist names Dalal. And, guys, when I say "hot", I mean she is freaking HOT!!!




So, what do you think? Is this Youtube star Dalal destined for greatness, or will she fade back into obscurity? Personally, I think this song is good enough for the radio. I only wish I could make a viral video someday with a girl this hot, lol :)
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Vegas Bound

Guest post from: Constance Rodgers

Moving is always stressful but I think it’s especially hard when you’re moving to Vegas. There are so many things to think about like the heat and the crowds, I’m half as nervous as I am excited! I’ve already got a job nailed down as an accountant at one of the big Casinos and I’m even considering buying the townhome I’m going to be renting my first few months out there. My friend Craig already lives there and he’s helped me research las vegas internet providers as well as utility companies in my area which I didn’t know anything about. I can’t wait to have my first night out on the strip and eat at some of the world class restaurants near my place – Vegas, here I come! I’m even sure some of my friends from home will come out and visit me when they find out I’ve got a second bedroom and a free place for them to stay! Who doesn’t love a Vegas vacation?
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How to dress like a doctor

All of us want to be a doctor. Just admit it. You fantasize owning a glittering hilltop mansion, a permanent tee-time at the most exclusive country club and a trophy wife who has more plastic in her than a Barbie doll.

The grim reality is most of us can't turn that fantasy into reality. Some of you will flunk out of medical school and spend your waiting tables at the local coffee shop. Others will find the costs of med school or malpractice insurance too cost prohibitive.

Still, there's no reason you can't live out your fantasies and pretend to be a doctor to impress everyone at your next high school reunion. You can find great deals on uniforms and scrubs at Blue Sky Scrubs. They have everything from white lab coats to medical nursing scrubs at great prices. And you can order any of these items direct off their website (http://www.blueskyscrubs.com).

Do us all a favor and just dress like a doctor. We don't need any more unlicensed surgeons operating out of the back of a minivan in a darkened alley!

Cool Physics -- Amazing waterspout 'tornado'

Check out this amazing video from Australia showing the effect of a "tornado" traveling over a body of water off the coast of Australia. Courtesy of the RussiaToday channel on Youtube.




I think the awesomeness of the video speaks for itself.
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Cool Physics -- Fun with Magnets

Check out this super cool video from Youtube where a guy does some amazing things with ball magnets. If you like science, geometry, magnets, or just cool things, you really need to check out this video.




Probably the coolest thing about this video for me is just all of the shapes that the guy manages to make in rapid succession. Whoever was making this video really has spent a lot of time playing with magnets to make all of the geometric shapes that you see in the video.

Maybe I've found a new hobby :)
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Monday, May 30, 2011

Family Guy - Christian Bale shouting at Peter

I know that this is old news, but it's still a classic. Enjoy Christan Bale's rant remixed with commentary from Peter Griffin.




It's just that funny.

Also, here is Bale's apology. It's a pretty lame apology.




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The history of VenomFangX 1of3 with commentary

I just found this hilarious video of someone debunking the videos from Youtube user VenomFangX that I wanted share with my blog readers. First, let me share a little history.

VenomFangX is among the most vocal of the  Youtube "Young Earth Creationism" advocates. He is a man, probably in his early 20's, who literally believes that the earth is about 6,000 years old. If that idiotic belief wasn't bad enough, he also tries to defend this belief through spewing pseudo-scientific facts on his Youtube channel -- which is consequently now defunct (at least for the moment).

However, as a testament to his stupidity, several Youtube users that accept science have made a series of commentaries about his videos, including the funny commentary that you see below.

So, if you want to see the ramblings of a young earth creationist destroyed, watch the video below.




At least he still has the Bible.

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Family Guy Banned Joke -- Pat Tillman

I found this joke, that was banned from the original episode, about Peter Griffin shooting Pat Tillman during the war in Afghanistan. It's a very funny but sad commentary on how friendly fire murdered Pat Tillman during his service in Afghanistan.



So, what do you think? Was this Family Guy clip funny or over the top?
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Sunday, May 29, 2011

5 Random Pictures of Hot Girls

Enjoy these five random pictures of super hot girls, courtesy of Future Twit.

Why? Because I can :)


1. Hot blonde in shorts:






2.  Hot girl in short dress:





3.  Hot girl in a bikini on a bed:





4.  Random hot girl:




5. Hot girl baseball fan:




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Saturday, May 28, 2011

My Thoughts: Sex Trafficking of Americans: The Girls Next Door Politics: vanityfair.com

Prostitute in Tijuana, Mexico.Image via Wikipedia
Sex Trafficking of Americans: The Girls Next Door Politics: vanityfair.com

I read this article from Vanity Fair about sex trafficking in the United States (so called "white slavery") earlier today, and it made me realize truly how sick people are in this world. As humans, we are only a few million years removed from our primate ancestors. At times, I like to think that we have made incredible advancements in the world in terms of technology, science, ethics, and morality. However, when I read articles like this one, I think that we are closer to still being a sick little bunch of monkeys than anyone really cares to admit.

One of the things I also think about when I read articles like this is about the idea of a god/gods and eternal punishment. Personally, I don't think the evidence supports the idea that god/gods exist. However, if a god does exist, I can only hope that this god will punish the men who caused so much trauma to these girl in the article thoroughly. The men who abuse others like this need to be punished in hell for a long, long time.

This article further serves as a reinforcement of how depraved men who visit prostitutes actually are. I have never visited a prostitute (nor would I -- I don't need to pay for sex in life), but I used to think that the guys who did that were maybe just lonely and the girls with whom they were having sex were making good money. However, after reading the article, I realize that so called "Johns" who visit prostitutes are a bunch of sick and sexually deviant bastards, especially after the article said that as many as 80% of the girls who are prostitutes are there against their will. How on earth can one human do those types of things to another human being? Do these men have no self control in life?

Check out the Vanity Fair article and leave a comment about your thoughts on human sex trafficking.
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Friday, May 27, 2011

Cat mom hugs baby kitten-- cute video

Check out this video of a momma cat hugging a little baby kitten while both of them are asleep. Cuteness and kitten lovers of the world: you have to check this out!!!



Isn't that the cutest thing ever?


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Thursday, May 26, 2011

The Navy beats Disney

Image representing The Walt Disney Company as ...Image via CrunchBase
I guess taking out terrorist masterminds isn't the only thing the Navy SEALS are good at doing.

Disney made a bid to trademark SEAL Team 6, the name of the squad responsible for dispatching Osama Bin-Laden in Pakistan. This time, the behemoth that Mickey Mouse built bit off more than it could chew.
Just 10 days after Disney applied for the trademark, hoping to make a fortune in merchandising, the U.S. Navy countered Disney with filings of its own.

Like a surgeon in decked out in brand new scrubs, the Navy sliced through Disney's devious attempt to make a quick buck and exposed their corporate greed for everyone to see.

With this latest entertainment conglomerate vanquished, maybe the Navy can start taking out other people and companies in Hollywood and take over that industry. Maybe they can use their own movies, TV shows and music to promote Naval careers, as "the Simpsons" once predicted would happen. Nothing will be beyond their subliminal reach. 

Yvan nht noij!


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Psycho Girlfriend: Series on Youtube

If you haven't already checked out the series "Psycho Girlfriend" from recklesstortuga on Youtube, you should. It's funny, albeit disturbing at times. The funny thing is to watch the lives of these poor guys who are dating this psychotic biatch of a girl in the series. The disturbing thing is that there are girls who actually act like this in the world. Every time I watch this series, it reminds me A LOT of my ex-wife. She used to have the crying fits, temper tantrums, and manipulation routines -- just like the girl in the video.





So, what do you think? Is this chick crazy or what?
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House Party with Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan at Calvin Klein Spring 2007 Fash...Image via Wikipedia
Lindsay Lohan is starting her house arrest today after pleading no contest to stealing a $2,500 gold necklace from a store in January. Lohan was sentenced to spend four months confined to her home fitted with an electronic ankle bracelet. 


She is expected to serve only 35 days of the sentence. So what will Lohan do to pass the time? 


Here are some ideas on what we think will happen: 


1. A date with Jack Daniels:
No we're not breaking news that Lohan is suddenly straight. Or that her latest flame is a butch lesbian named Jackie exploring surgery to become Jack. We're talking about her lover in a bottle that has been a constant companion so many years. 


2. Read movie scripts
Given the way her career has tanked in recent years, this is the closest Lohan will come to landing regular acting jobs again (at least until that movie about John Gotti hits theaters). 


3. Poker night with Mel Gibson, Gary Busey and Nick Nolte
Okay, there is a generational gap here. Still, birds of a feather flock together. First one to go off on a drunken rant wins! 


4. Break out the spy equipment
Lohan will make like "Rear Window" or "Disturbia" (aka: Rear Window for teens) and start spying on her neighbors with her digital camera, camcorder and binoculars. Hey, it's a great way for finding new ways to score some coke since her regular supply lines won't be available. 


5. Rethink her life and devote herself to helping humanity
This last scenario will happen about the time a Republican presidential candidate actually publicly admits to agreeing with President Barack Obama on an issue.


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Steps to becoming a paparazzi

Category:Photographers who committed suicideImage via Wikipedia
Regardless of what President Obama says, the economy is not getting better for most of us. Fortunately, there is still a growth industry out there and it's not too late to get a piece of the action. I'm talking about stalking celebrities and taking photos! Tabloids pay tens of thousands of dollars for celebs caught at their most embarrassing moments.

The first step to becoming a rich paparazzi is finding an edge over your competition. You need to stake out a celebrity's residence and do an old-fashioned stakeout. That means hiding a motion activated camera  and voice recorder connected to clarion wireless headphones among their latest awards show swag, so you can track their movements and hear when they are leaving. At that point you can break out a camera equipped with the latest nikon telephoto lens and your ticket to getting money at the expense of stupid celebrities is there to claim.

We here at Future Twits are all about lining our pockets through embarrassing celebrities, although we admit they already do a good job of it on their own.

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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Diet Coke + Mentos FAIL -- Camera Man Takes a Beating

Watch this hilarious video of a redneck cameraman getting taken out by a fail involving diet coke and some Mentos. My favorite part is when the original guy who put the Mentos in the Diet Coke burst out laughing as his friend with the camera gets hit in the face.




Yes, I know -- immature but still funny.
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Doomsday - Friday song parody - May 21st Rapture

I found this awesome song on Youtube today. Watch this awesome parody of Rebecca Black's "Friday" song entitled "Doomsday". The cut scenes mixed in from movies are very clever, albeit disturbing.




I have to say that this is way, way better than the original song, a song which is among the most disliked by fans on Youtube. For comparison, here is the original song. Warning: it sucketh big time.



So, what do you think? Is this a good parody, or is it overrated?


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Bill Maher's Take On The Rapture: May 21 2011

As most of you probably know by now, crackpot minister Harold Camping proclaimed that the "rapture" was going to occur on May 21, 2011. This was going to start out with an earthquake in Asia, followed by worldwide destruction where 200 million "righteous" people would be lifted into heaven while the rest of the earth's population suffered below (charming sounding fellow this God character is, btw).

However, and not surprisingly, the anticipated rapture never happened. Probably the best reaction to the event not happening (as everyone knew that it wouldn't) was from famed comedian and agnostic Bill Maher. Watch his comments in this video from Youtube below:




I agree. I will make the same bet, even though 5,000 dollars is a lot more money to me than it is to him. Somebody pick a date for the "rapture" to occur -- sometime within the next few years to be reasonable. If they're right, I will pay them five grand. If they're not right (and they won't be right), they will pay me five grand.

Are there any takers out there? Come on, rapture believers: put your money where your faith is. Or, is your faith just for show?
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Monday, May 23, 2011

David Letterman - Martin Short's Osama Farewell - Candle in the Wind

Watch this hilarious tribute from Martin Short on the David Letterman Show where he sing "Candle in the Wind" for Osama Bin Laden. If you haven't seen this . . . then you haven't seen it!




So, what do you think about this tribute mocking the death of Osama Bin Laden and his death in Afghanistan? Do you think it's funny, inappropriate, or just overrated? Personally, my favorite part is where he talks about Osama being a "bastard in the sand".
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Hot ESPN Reporter Doris Burke Flubs Lines on Live TV

I think that the title pretty much describes it all. Watch as hot television reporter Doris Burke messes up her lines on live TV for the NBA finals in 2011. Is that just me, or did the words f*ck hole just come out of her mouth?




Well, she has a potty mouth, but that doesn't mean that we can't both admire her perfectionism and want to kiss the nastiness out of her shapely lips. So, what do you guys think? Would you make out with Doris?
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Sunday, May 22, 2011

I Need a Doctor: Parody and Original -- Eminem & Dr. Dre

I thought that I would share a funny parody of the new song "I Need a Doctor" from Dr. Dre. featuring Eminem and Skylar Grey. The original song is one of the better songs that I've heard in a while, a nice mix of hip hop with a vocal melody. However, every song needs a good parody. So, here is the parody of "I Need a Doctor", courtesy of Barely Political.




For reference, here is the original song. If you want to skip the intro, fast forward to 2:45.




Also, here is the vocal by Skylar Grey without the hip hop.


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Garbage Guy Kicks Some ASS

Want to know what happens when you scare the garbage collector? Just watch this video to see some poor kid almost get his ass kicked for jumping out of a box and scaring the garbage man.




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Saturday, May 21, 2011

T-Mobile Royal Wedding Dance Parody

I know that this is already up on like a thousand websites, but I couldn't help but throw my site into the mix. Here is the famous internet viral video of T-Mobile's tribute to the William and Kate royal wedding by the wedding dance parody.



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Friday, May 20, 2011

Jon Stewart Commentary on Ben Stein -- Blaming a Rape Victim

Dominique Strauss-Kahn (French socialist polit...Image via Wikipedia
Ben Stein -- of the evolution-is-a-conspiracy-by-science-and-Satan-against-the-world fame -- has now come out with another opinion, this time regarding the innocence of Dominique Strauss-Kahn, head of the International Monetary Fund, in his charges of rape against a New York City chambermaid. If you hadn't already figured it out by now, Ben Stein is an idiot, a certifiable moron. Watch as he is eviscerated by Jon Stewart on The Daily Show for being a pompous ass who blames the victim in a rape case



For reference, here is another comical interview between Ben Stein and Richard Dawkins where Stein reveals his complete ignorance of all things scientific.



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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

South Park Explains Evolution: Retarded Fish-Frog-Squirrel-Monkey

Check out this cool video from South Park where the teacher explains evolution as a series of events involving "butt sex" between animals of different species.



Judging from this video, I take it that the creators of South Park have a lot of experience with the way Creationists think about the world.
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Funny Youtube Video -- Don't call me a homo!

I found this gem of a video on Youtube the other day where a little kid, probably about 12 years old, get mad at the people on Youtube for calling him a "homo". Well, is that maybe because the kid still hasn't hit puberty yet? Watch the funny videos from Youtube below. First, the original video:






Second, a remake with Bill O'Reilly -- don't call Bill a homo.





Third, the staple of every funny Youtube video -- the autotune remix.




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Top Ten Creationist Arguments

I found this cool video from TheThinkingAtheist channel on Youtube, and I thought that I would share it. It's basically a summary of the top 10 arguments in favor of creationism and why all of those arguments are laughably wrong. Enjoy.




I would just like to add a little commentary on a few of those points. First, I have actually been on religious message boards before where one or more posters emphasizes the first argument -- that carbon dating is too inaccurate to determine the age of the earth. Another popular argument on message boards is about the irreducible complexity of the eye. So, yes, these arguments do crop up a lot, at least in religious circles.

The argument that they didn't put in here that I was really expecting to see is the idea that dinosaur bones were put into the earth by Satan. I have heard this one a lot in my life too, and I really expected it to be in the video. Maybe it would be in the honorable mentions category?

Do you believe in creationism? Leave your thoughts below.
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Sunday, May 15, 2011

President Obama a Muslim? Osama Bin Laden Thought So!

Osama bin Laden thanks America for Barack Obam...Image by Zooomabooma via Flickr
Even though there has been a lot of buzz lately about Osama Bin Laden's porn stash in his compound in Pakistan, I think that the media is downplaying the most interesting fact learned from the raid: that Osama Bin Laden considered President Barack Obama a muslim. Watch the video below (or fast forward to 3:24 if you want to see the pertinent quote).



I especially like the disclaimer of, "Even though Barack Obama is a Christian . . .". Feeling the need to hide something possibly, eh news media? I mean, it's not like someone with the middle name Hussein who went to school in Indonesia for four years that offered religious instruction in Islam each day could POSSIBLY be mistaken by the Muslim world as one of their own. Nope, never.

So, carry on, President Osama . . .

Er, I mean, President Obama.
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Saturday, May 14, 2011

Glenn Beck is a Big, Fat, Possibly Gay (?) Idiot

Glenn Beck is a Big, Fat, Possibly Gay (?) Idiot

by Guest Blogger

Meghan McCain dared to show her collarbone and a tiny bit of cleavage for a skin cancer PSA.  In response to this “naked” video, Glenn Beck pretended to vomit for several minutes.  The question for us at Future Twits is what seemingly heterosexual man would vomit over an attractive naked woman.  I don’t think Glenn Beck is gay and certainly the gay community would never want to claim him as their own.  The only other reason for his juvenile, elementary school behavior is that he is a male chauvinist pig.  Glenn Beck is an old, fat, ugly, stupid, lying, blowhard afraid that a woman might show a little bit of skin.  He found this PSA so scary at the thought of Meghan being naked.  I can think of an even scary scenario, Glenn Beck could have been naked.

 Here is a video of the Meghan McCain PSA announcement:






Here is the clip from the Glenn Beck show where he mocks Meghan over the PSA. Warning: some viewers might find this highly juvenile.



Here is the Meghan McCain response article and the John McCain response on CNN:




But, it's not like this is the only time Glenn Beck has shown misogyny towards a woman on his show. Take a gander at his "fail" with a beautiful swinger who was a guest on his show where he offers to take a picture of her naked. Yikes!!!




But, I guess we can't fault Glenn too much for this. I mean, after all, with his good looks and perfect body, maybe he just gets tired of everyone else being fat. I mean, just look at this sexy picture of Glenn:




Ladies: wouldn't you want to wake up next to this every morning?

So, in summary, Glenn Beck is a woman-hating, obese, obnoxious, piggish, possibly gay, sorry excuse for a human being.

Is anyone surprised?

Note: Sorry to our gay friends. Identifying Glenn Beck as possibly one of you is in no way meant to demean you. You are, on average, so much better than him -- and you have good fashion sense :)

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Friday, May 13, 2011

Osama and His Porn

osama bin laden t-shirt (1)Image by Paul Keller via Flickr
In case you missed the news from Reuters today, lots and lots of hard core porn has been found on hard drives (no pun intended) seized from the Pakistan compound of Osama Bin Laden. I have decided to take the mildly humorous one.

Here is the irony of the situation to me: this Bin Laden guy swears an oath to destroy western civilization, bring jihad down on the world, win his 72 virgins in heaven, or whatever cooky fundamentalists like him believe. Yet, he still gets his jollies not from reading the "sacred" Koran but by whacking off, probably to pictures of western girls.

Or, perhaps Western guys.

However, be that as it may, it is still indicative of the way that most of the fundamentalists of the world role. After all, it's usually the guy with the loudest voice condemning porn in public that has the biggest porn stash in private.

So, the question becomes: is this a propaganda piece against Osama so that he doesn't become a martyr?

Possibly.

But, any religion that would make a guy who has killed thousands of innocent people a hero is a disgrace to humanity anyway. So, if this little piece of propaganda stops even one Muslim man from blowing himself up in a shopping mall full of Jews, so much the better.


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Bin Laden's Son Cries Foul Over Father's Death

A still of 2004 Osama bin Laden videoImage via Wikipedia
Much like an annoying kid in the schoolyard who grabs away a basketball and heads home because he doesn't like how the game was being played, Osama Bin Laden's son doesn't want to play any longer.

Omar Bin Laden is crying foul after a crack team of Navy SEALS stormed his father's compound and executed the founder and leader of Al-Qaeda. It put an end to a decade-long manhunt for the terrorist mastermind behind the September 11, 2001 attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon that left thousands dead or injured. Millions welcomed the death of a man who caused untold pain and misery while using terrorism to gain traction for his warped view of Islam.

Omar was not one of them. The younger Bin Laden previously condemned his father's terrorist agenda. Apparently, though, he does not think the United States was justified in raiding Osama Bin Laden's compound and putting an end to his life right then and there.

In a statement released to the New York Times and other media outlets on Tuesday, Omar Bin Laden insisted his father deserved a trial according to international law. He and his brothers condemned the United States for executing his father rather than submitting him to a trial like former dictators Saddam Hussein and Slobodan Milosoevic.

"We maintain that arbitrary killing is not a solution to political problems and crime's adjudication as Justice must be seen to be done," the statement read.

Omar may not like his father's fate, but the fact is Osama Bin Laden chose his fate. He declared war on the United States. His bloodlust would not be satisfied until he had killed every man, woman and child in what he perceived to be an infidel nation. Keeping such an awful human being alive served no useful purpose. Why give him a platform like a public trial to rally additional supporters to his cause?

Instead of condemning the United States for taking appropriate actions on a terrorist leader who sowed the seeds for the current war in Afghanistan, maybe Omar should focus on condemning his father for destroying the lives of millions across the globe in the name of his terrorist agenda.

It would be a step in the right direction in repairing the damage done by Osama Bin Laden.
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Thursday, May 12, 2011

Bin Laden's son crying foul over father's death

US propaganda leaflet used in Afghanistan.Image via Wikipedia

Much like an annoying kid in the schoolyard who grabs away a basketball and heads home because he doesn't like how the game was being played, Osama Bin Laden's son doesn't want to play any longer.

Omar Bin Laden is crying foul after a crack team of Navy SEALS stormed his father's compound and executed the founder and leader of Al-Qaeda. It put an end to a decade-long manhunt for the terrorist mastermind behind the September 11, 2011 attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon that left thousands dead or injured.

Millions welcomed the death of a man who caused untold pain and misery while using terrorism to gain traction for his warped view of Islam. Omar was not one of them.

The younger Bin Laden previously condemned his father's terrorist agenda. Apparently, though, he does not think the United States was justified in raiding Osama Bin Laden's compound and putting an end to his life right then and there.

In a statement released to the New York Times and other media outlets on Tuesday, Omar Bin Laden insisted his father deserved a trial according to international law. He and his brothers condemned the United States for executing his father rather than submitting him to a trial like former dictators Saddam Hussein and Slobodan Miloševic.

“We maintain that arbitrary killing is not a solution to political problems and crime's adjudication as Justice must be seen to be done,” the statement read.

Omar may not like his father's fate, but the fact is Osama Bin Laden chose his fate. He declared war on the United States. His bloodlust would not be satisfied until he had killed every man, woman and child in what he perceived to be an infidel nation. Keeping such an awful human being alive served no useful purpose. Why give him a platform like a public trial to rally additional supporters to his cause?

Instead of condemning the United States for taking appropriate actions on a terrorist leader who sowed the seeds for the current war in Afghanistan, maybe Omar should focus on condemning his father for destroying the lives of millions across the globe in the name of his terrorist agenda.

It would be a step in the right direction in repairing the damage done by Osama Bin Laden.
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