Monday, April 30, 2012

Glorious Master Translator from Japanese

I found this on Reddit the other day, and I decided that it was funny enough to make the blog (not that I'm really all that selective to begin with). It's a series of emails between a guy who pretends that he can speak Japanese and a guy who wants help translating a manual for his CD player. The resulting exchange is pretty funny.

 With posts like this one, I'm always a little suspicious that they are fake. However, even if this post is fake, the exchange is still quite creative. If the exchange is real, then it's genius.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Poor Leonardo Dicaprio -- Internet Memes

Poor Leonardo Dicaprio! If his movie roles are any reflection on his real life, things must be quite depressing for him. Instead of helping, we here at Future Twit have decided to mock his pain. Enjoy!

Poor Leonardo Dicaprio Meme

Enhanced by Zemanta

Guy Builds a Star Trek Phaser -- That Works!

At one time, I think that all Trekkies have dreamed of building their own functioning phaser. This gentleman, however, has gone one step further -- he built a working phaser! See it to believe it below.

Guy Builds A Star Trek Phaser - Watch More Funny Videos
Enhanced by Zemanta


Just like the title says, it's a funny (somewhat) video where a guy deliberately lets a girl's shirt go unbuttoned for the longest time without telling her to button it up.

If nothing else, you get to see some cheap cleavage from it. That can't be half bad, right?

Enhanced by Zemanta

Flowchart of Mormon Beliefs

As the title says, it's a humorous flowchart of Mormon beliefs. Enjoy!

Flowchart of Mormon Beliefs

Enhanced by Zemanta

How to Irritate: Porsche Owners, Scientists, and English Majors

The following is an instructional cartoon strip on how to irritate the following groups of people: Porsche owners, scientists, and English majors.

Suffice it to say that the English majors and Porsche owners are non-overlapping groups.

How to Irritate: Porsche Owners, Scientists, & English Majors

Enhanced by Zemanta

Professors: What I Really Do

Okay, I lied. I found another cool meme: "Professors, what I really do".

The six categories are: "What my parents think I do", "What my friends think I do", "What my students think I do", "What my spouse thinks I do", "What my colleagues think I do", and "What I actually do".

My favorite -- for selfish reasons -- would be if professors or teachers actually did what their colleagues think that they do. Of course, they don't. :(

Professors Meme: What I Actually Do

Enhanced by Zemanta

Smart Girls: What I Really Do

I had more or less decided to get away from the memish blog posts until I found this next six picture meme. It's about the sexiest kind of girls in the world: smart girls!

The six categories are: "What my friends think I do", "What my mom thinks I do", "What society thinks I do", "What guys think I do", "What I think I do", and "What I really do".

Enhanced by Zemanta

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Schematic Explaining Evolution of Online Dating

I found this cool diagram explaining (quite accurately) the evolution of thought in a guy in the online dating process. This includes the initial hopeful stage where a guy sends a message to a woman he believes has been specifically chosen for him by a sophisticated algorithm, the realization that the woman is not going to respond, and the eventual transition to guys messaging girls at random with generic comments.

Evolution of Online Dating

It's sad, but often it seems like online dating -- just like dating in general -- depends much more on how big of a douche bag a guy is as opposed to any sort of compatibility.
Enhanced by Zemanta

Meanwhile in Russia -- Funny Video

There is some really crazy crap that goes on in Russia. This next video is a perfect example.

So, what do we learn from this video. Well, five things: 1. Cats like to chew on cigarettes 2. Women dump garbage in occupied man holes 3. Cars can't park 4. Girls adjust their underwear in front of occupied cars and 5. Frogs don't like being teased with fake ants.

Who knew?
Enhanced by Zemanta

I Am Graduating Soon

Well, folks, I am graduating soon. It's been a long road, but my college career is nearly over. I am super excited by this prospect. It's about frigging time!

There are a lot of things that I have done to prepare, and there are a lot of things left to do. For example, I have already bought my cap and gown. I am excited because I actually have a tassel on my graduation robe from an honor society.

I am still trying to find a place to guy graduation announcements, although I think that the link that I included is a good starting point. I really want my friends and family to share in this joyous occasion. I know that they are as excited for me as I am for me!

I haven't decided if I am going to have a party or not yet. On the one hand, it is a good excuse to have more cake and ice cream. I really can't get enough of that cake and ice cream in life, or that Golden Crisp for that matter. The high fructose corn syrup, I have found through careful study, is extremely good for me and my health. I know this from a 60 minutes interview on the subject that I recently saw and also from my classes on the topic.

In other news, I will be graduating before my best friend. I bet that she is jealous of me! If she was smart, maybe she would marry me and become a housewife. That would be so much fun. She really is pretty and smart, and she is kind of a tiger!

Well, I guess that is my latest update for the day. If you want to see the golden rainbow, jump over the bridge of prosperity. Leave your comments and suggestions below.

Friday, April 20, 2012

Draw Something -- Worst Internet Experience of All?

I found this truly awesome status update today. In it, the person goes through the worst of what the internet has had to offer historically: 28.8 K loading speeds, AOL Chat rooms, ICQ dating, crappy Macs, crappy Internet Explorer, unwanted penis viewing via Chat Roulette, and trolling on the Reddit and 4Chan forums. However, in his or her opinion, nothing is worse than the idiots that seem to inhabit the online game Draw Something.

Draw Something Sucks!

The people who play that game should be ashamed ...
Enhanced by Zemanta

Only In Malaysia -- A Funny Film about Malaysian Culture

I found this charming film today about all of the odd things that go on in Malaysian culture. Every culture around the world has their idiosyncrasies, and this one is no exception. Still, as an American, it's fun to see the strange things other people in the world do, not just the strange things they do in the American culture.

So, check out this video made "By Malaysians, for Malaysians" and let me know what you think in the comments below.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Horsing Around

Horsing Around

This guest post from Rafael Hodge

My friend is constantly talking about this fabulous channel she watches that offers all kinds of neat advice on food, wine, decorating, entertaining, and provides recipes and demonstrations and she learns so much from it. I do not get that channel so she suggested I consider my options and call TV By Direct to get the best deal. She is always spouting some new tip she learned or having me over to try a new cocktail or appetizer while we sit out on her back patio in the country and listen to the sounds of nature while the breezes from the woods surrounding her house, drift through and cool us on those hot evenings. I love going to her house and being outside. She has horses and sometimes we go to the barn and sit in the field outside it among the horses and drink wine. It is pretty darn amazing! The horses love the smell of the wine and I have pictures of them sniffing over my shoulder. They are beautiful and gentle, which is good, since I have always been afraid of large animals.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Colon vs. Cologne -- Spelling does matter

Women: Do you love the smell of your dad's colon? How about his cologne? Well, depending on your answer, you could either be a daddy's girl or have had an abusive childhood.

Here are some more victims of the colon vs. cologne spelling error, courtesy of Twitter.

Colon vs. Cologne -- Spelling Does Matter

Enhanced by Zemanta

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Shopping for a Car in United Kingdom

As an American, I know a lot about shopping for a car in the United Kingdom. And, when I go to find a car, I know that the best source to find car companies that I trust is from online. However, in the sea of websites, which website is the right one for me?

Fortunately, the answer came to me yesterday (and not in a dream). The best and most trusted website for Trusted Dealers is one which carefully explains my options and helps me to decide how to spend my money on cars in the United Kingdom.

You see, this site is unique because it is actually OWNED by car dealers (note: OWNED not PWNED). A lot of the other car sites out there are owned by random people who have no business owning a car website. However, with the Trusted Dealers website, I know that I am getting a website owned by people that are actual car dealers. I know that I can trust myself and my children to these people and the wonderful cars they provide.

If you want to know more, simply check out the link above. Also, help me out by Tweeting this to your friends and coworkers.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Digorno -- Realistic Pizza Cooking Directions

I found this cool graphic about realistic pizza cooking directions when cooking a Digorno Pizza. This is instead of the more mundane directions usually found on the back of a box that actually makes your pizza come out tasting good.

Add caption

It's not delivery -- it's garbage time midnight pizza!
Enhanced by Zemanta

Cats Don't Follow The Laws of Nature

In case there was ever any doubt, cats don't actually follow the laws of nature. If you need proof, just go ask the people on the Reddit forums.

Cats don't follow laws of nature

If you hate cats, Loki will kill you.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Monday, April 16, 2012

College Humor Video -- My Little Brony!

I found this funny -- but very disturbing -- video on College Humor today. It's about an emotionally stunted 30 year old guy who still likes to play with My Little Pony dolls.

Sadly, I am sure that there probably are guys like that in the world.

So, yep. Freaky.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Be Careful Where You Put Stickers!

This is Future Twit, with a reminder to be careful where you put discount stickers when labeling product. It could ... change the meaning of things -- a lot.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Patrick Stewart on Top Gear: This Must Be a Terrible Show

When the most famous guest that you've ever had on a show is Patrick Stewart, you know that your show is in trouble, as Patrick Stewart noted during his appearance on Top Gear.

Patrick Stewart on Top Gear

Enhanced by Zemanta

Puppy Getting Hoovered for Fur Removal

Here is a cute gif that I found that shows a puppy dog getting vacuumed to remove excess fur. The cuteness factor is off the charts.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Saturday, April 14, 2012

TNT Commercial -- Belgian Town

I found this cool little commercial on Youtube earlier today. It's an interactive commercial where TNT set up an action sequence in a small town in Belgium. These Belgians were in for a surprise, as you can see from the following video.

 I just imagine a sequence happening in the small town where I grew up. The people there would have had a heart attack.

 Let me know what you think of the commercial. 
Enhanced by Zemanta

Dawkins debunks dowsing

I found this cool video not too long ago, courtesy of my fascination with and admiration for Richard Dawkins. It's a video where he debunks dowsing: the pseudo-scientific practice of finding running water underneath the ground by holding a stick.

 The theory goes that, once the stick is placed over underground water, the person holding the stick will feel a downward force as the stick is mysteriously attracted to the water.

It's a good idea, except for the fact that it doesn't work. Several scientific studies have been done on dowsing (including the one shown in the video), and none of them of which I am aware have given evidence that dowsing is valid.

So, while the ultimate status of dowsing will always be open for believers, for scientists dowsing must be consigned to the dustbin of bad ideas, joined by the likes of alchemy and astrology.

 Feel free to leave your thoughts on dowsing below.
Enhanced by Zemanta

Friday, April 13, 2012

Scotts Snap Garden Spreader System -- Snap Up The Opportunity!!!

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Scotts® for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.

When I am working in my home garden, I often ask myself why things aren't growing. Often, the answer has nothing to do with my rocky soil or me forgetting to water my plants regularly. It actually has to do with a distinct lack of fertilizer. I would spread bag and bags of fertilizer on my garden and lawn, but I am simply too tired from work and too lazy from exhaustion.

Scotts® Snap® Spreader System

This is where the Scotts System enters the picture. Thanks to Scotts, I can now spread fertilizer on my lawn and garden with ease! They have a new system out there for fertilizing your lawn called the Scotts Snap Garden Spreader System. Basically, you take the fertilizer, snap it on, and watch as it spreads evenly across all of your surfaces. Even better, the snap system connects securely to the spreader system, so there is no more throwing bags willy-nilly around your yard, breaking your back in the process.

Even better, Scotts has a series of perks available for liking their Facebook page. For just one like, you are entered to win free prizes -- a great value! After all, who doesn't like free stuff? I sure as heck don't -- not like free stuff that is!

Snap perks on Facebook

So, I encourage all of my readers to run out and buy Scotts today -- a name that you can trust!


Visit Sponsor's Site

Ron + His (Snooki) Rat?!

Are you a fan of rats? Neither am I. How about a fan of rats involving Snooki from Jersey Shore? Well, neither am I. Enjoy the next pic anyway.

Ron + His (Snooki) Rat

Enhanced by Zemanta

North Korea: Failure to Launch Movie Poster

I found a clever poster today that parodies North Korea and their failure to launch a rocket today with a movie poster from the movie with Sarah Jessica Parker of the same name.

If you like the poster, let the world know by leaving a comment below!

Kim Jong Eun -- Failure to Launch Movie Poster.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Sweden and Finland: EU's Cock and Balls?

I found a picture that advocates that Norway join the EU without delay. The rationale? It's not political; it's aesthetic. Without this extra country, the combination of Sweden and Finland looks like a cock + balls, as the picture below demonstrates.

The text of the picture is: "I feel that Norway should join the EU without delay. Not for any political or economic reasons, just to stop Sweden and Finland from looking like a big cock and balls on the new euro coins".

Well said.

Sweden + Finland = Cock + Balls?

Enhanced by Zemanta

Skaing Down the Stairs: Win!

Any time you can skate down a flight of stairs in your shoes, it's a win.

Skating down the stairs: win!
Enhanced by Zemanta


Related Posts with Thumbnails
comments powered by Disqus