Thursday, May 26, 2011

House Party with Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan at Calvin Klein Spring 2007 Fash...Image via Wikipedia
Lindsay Lohan is starting her house arrest today after pleading no contest to stealing a $2,500 gold necklace from a store in January. Lohan was sentenced to spend four months confined to her home fitted with an electronic ankle bracelet. 

She is expected to serve only 35 days of the sentence. So what will Lohan do to pass the time? 

Here are some ideas on what we think will happen: 

1. A date with Jack Daniels:
No we're not breaking news that Lohan is suddenly straight. Or that her latest flame is a butch lesbian named Jackie exploring surgery to become Jack. We're talking about her lover in a bottle that has been a constant companion so many years. 

2. Read movie scripts
Given the way her career has tanked in recent years, this is the closest Lohan will come to landing regular acting jobs again (at least until that movie about John Gotti hits theaters). 

3. Poker night with Mel Gibson, Gary Busey and Nick Nolte
Okay, there is a generational gap here. Still, birds of a feather flock together. First one to go off on a drunken rant wins! 

4. Break out the spy equipment
Lohan will make like "Rear Window" or "Disturbia" (aka: Rear Window for teens) and start spying on her neighbors with her digital camera, camcorder and binoculars. Hey, it's a great way for finding new ways to score some coke since her regular supply lines won't be available. 

5. Rethink her life and devote herself to helping humanity
This last scenario will happen about the time a Republican presidential candidate actually publicly admits to agreeing with President Barack Obama on an issue.

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