Sexcapades, Hobbyists and more: Types of bloggers

5 Types of Bloggers

Ask yourself: what poor sap would spend hours writing a blog entry that (probably) less than 30 people are likely to read?

n In my experience, there are 5 types.

1. Sexcapades

-- A broad category reserved for the women of blogger who revel in sharing their infection . . . I mean infectious love of sex with the other members of the blogging community. Often a self styled “relationship therapist” for other bloggers, a “makeup expert” or “clubber”, these girls (and I say girls because no one wants to read about a man’s sex life) share every real, intimate detail of every sexual experience of their young lives – and throw in a few fake ones for free.

Upside:

These girls get a lot of readership. Every girl wants to be them; every guy wants to do them.

Downside:

These blogs are interesting in the same way watching someone peel a wart off their foot with a razor is interesting: you want to watch to see what happens next, but you don’t want to touch because it’s gross.

2. Family Journal

Some people like to take the personal, private moments of life and treasure them in a personal family journal, accessible only by themselves or maybe close friends and family. Others enjoy posting them on the internet for everyone to see. From baby vomit to family vacations to poems about slitting wrists, these women (yes women!) and bratty teen girls broadcast every waking moment of their lives for all to enjoy.

Upside:

Again, these bloggers get a lot of readers. A woman with baby spit all over her new jeans likes nothing better than reading about an older, fatter mother with baby even more baby spit on her jeans. A teen who wants to cut her wrists because her parents don’t understand her wants to hear about another teen girl who’s parents also don’t understand her and who’s boyfriend is dating her former best friend.

Downside:

Journalists: nobody cares. They just want gossip and to see you suffer.

3. Hobbyist

Do you have something you enjoy? Do you want to find others who enjoy this something as well? Do you want to tell others about this something anyway, ear raping them over and over with the details until they beg for mercy? Well, hobby blogging is for you!

Upside:

Even though the readership on these blogs tends to be less than the first two types, the posts tend to be more interesting. Also, at least the guys (and few girls) that do this are passionate about something in life – be it cars, sports, or wine in Napa Valley – and that is always fun too.

Downside:

These blogs are kind of a one trick pony and are only fun to read about once per month or so. Also, there is little opportunity to expand the blog, so most of the writers run out of things to say eventually and quit writing.

Well, this entry is getting long, so I am going to save the last two categories for later: rant bloggers and get-rich-quickers.

Reader Feedback: Leave a comment telling me what kind of blog you have or what kind you enjoy the most! Are you a “sexcapader” and proud of it?